Directions: After carefully reading the draft, reread it, this time with the intention of commenting on it along the way. Write notes in the margins, underline passages you want to draw attention to, place a question mark or asterisk where you find the text confusing. Make sure your comments and suggestions go beyond mere editing. There's no need to edit the draft at this stage, as you know. When you've finished reading and commenting on the draft, take out a sheet of paper, put your name on it, and write to the author:

1. Discuss your reaction to the ad(s) the writer is analyzing. Share what reactions you yourself have to the ad, what you think is interesting or compelling about it. Is this an ad you might have used yourself for this assignment? Why or why not? Would you have noticed the same things the writer did? Is there anything you noticed about the ad that the writer didn't mention in the paper? Explain.
2. Point out what you feel are the writer's strengths in this draft. You can use some of the following questions to guide your comments. What strikes you as accomplished particularly well? What seems most powerful to you about this paper? What were the paper's highlights, the places where you read with the most interest? What aspect of the analysis did you find most interesting or informative? Did the writer help you to view the ad in a new way? Was the quality of the writing-the blend of style and substance-something you found impressive?
3. Point out areas of the paper that you think need improvement. You can use some of the following questions to guide your comments. Is the overall structure (introduction, body, conclusion) in place? Is the thesis clear and worded effectively? Do you know exactly what the writer wants to analyze in the essay? Does the writer use effective supporting detail to make general assertions more vivid and powerful? Are the paragraphs, and the sentences within the paragraphs, unified and coherent? Is there an effective introduction? Is the thesis of the paper worded effectively?
4. Scan through the paper one last time to recheck focus, organization, development, unity, coherence and style. What are some of the ways you think the writing can be improved, other than by correcting errors you might notice?
5. Lastly, indicate to the writer whether or not you found it difficult or easy to relate to the analysis of the ad(s). Did the subject touch any chord in you, or did you feel indifferent towards it. If you felt indifferent, is there something you can suggest to the writer that will help him/her improve your level of interest?
   

Focus - Find the sentence that states the paper's thesis. That is very important for an analytical essay. Does the writer have an explicit thesis, or is the main idea stated too broadly? Locate the sentence or group of sentences that express the essay's controlling idea and underline it/them. Write "THESIS?" in the margin to direct the writer's attention directly to this component of the essay. Do you come away from the paper feeling like it has communicated a clear message that you could articulate for yourself?

Organization - Is the paper arranged in a logical fashion? Do you have any suggestions about how the writer might improve the sequence of paragraphs? When you look at the paragraphs individually, do they seem unified and coherent, or will the writer have to work on some of them to make sure the sentences are arranged logically?

Development - Does the paper use enough supporting detail to make general assertions clear and convincing? Does the writer ever rely on common rhetorical modes of development like description, compare/contrast, illustration, definition, classification, cause/effect analysis, process analysis, analogy? Where might one of more of these strategies be applied to fully explain something that seems only half explained?

Style - Does the writer consistently maintain an objective tone, using 3rd person p.o.v. when appropriate? (That's not to say that expressive elements can't enter into the discussion as long as the primary goal is to write an objective analysis.)